I've been accused by male friends of thinking like a man, maybe it comes from me being small chested.

I'm at school and we've been having exams all this past week and last week. I'm done all of them except for math. I smoked two fat J's and 4 bowls before the test and i was trippin' out hardcore, so i didn't finish math, the school is letting me finish it on thursday. V's friend Skittles comes to the school and he is fucking gorgeous, they're so many chicks that want him. There's this whole big thing going on cause hes going out with this chick named Lola and this chick named Courtney practically tries to rape his ass when hes around, lol. Anyways besides that R. and I have been talking and we've decided to stay friends and Texas is not allowed to phone my house because my mom fucking told him off and said she'd send people after him if he phoned again. What a bitch. I haven't talked to M. in a long time or B., i'm not sure why i just haven't. Oh well. My mom is still sending me to Casa House, which is basically lock up,as long as i get my weed i'm sure i'll be fine. I also found out that my stepdad is a dealer,lol, lucky me. I'm moving in with him and my stepmom when i move out of my house and i won't have to pay rent or anything like that. woo hoo!! Anyways i g2g cause my mom is bitching.

The night slowly pass me by

and i keep thinking about you and i.

Can't close my eyes, can't forget all the tears

but everything around me just reminds me how much i need you here.

We hurt each other with unsaid words

and forgave our faults with secret thoughts

but when i was finally fed up with your lies

you kept me coming back with your honest eyes.

And it hurts, it hurts so bad

and i only wish you knew

all the things i never said.

Nights seemed so cold and days so heavy

but just remember, baby

that it was still us,

nothing but us.

I know i made too many mistakes

and your broken promises were as slimy as snakes,

our fears build a wall between our hearts

but you know how this limbo is tearing me apart.

Too in love to hate what we were

and too weak to forget what we felt.

I miss your love and your sweet lips

but my heart tells me i can't take any more risks.

And it hurts, it hurts so bad

and i only wish you knew

all the things i never said.

Nights seemed so cold and days so heavy

but just remember, baby

that it was still us,

nothing but us.

9:33 p.m. - 2002-01-29