Sexual healing

I'm addicted to his touch, i'm addicted to his voice. I'm addicted to his hands. I'm addicted to his sex.

I was never like this before. I dont think i ever enjoyed sex with men before.Now its like i'm hungry, i'm starving for it. All the time. I cant get enough and when i dont get any...i cant think straight. One single touch...one whisper in my ear...one look at him sets me on fire.A gentle touch of his lips against my neck leads me to fantasize about what he may do to me later. The one thing that is killing me...the thing that makes this even harder is the fact that it always has to be rushed. No more four hour long sessions where every single nerve is hit and i feel like i'm in heaven, no more cuddling naked together afterwards. No way in hell can we do that...his mother would catch us in no time. From being able to have sex all the time, whenever we wanted, not having to be quiet, not having to worry about being caught, to this is wreaking havock on me. I mean jesus, i'm seriously considering just doing it anywhere we can find.Bathrooms, elevators, outside...anywhere really as long as i can get off.

I'm making a goal for myself and i hope that i can keep it, because i'm sick of isolating myself from people. I just dont want to hang out with the same people i used to. So my goal for this month is to meet at least 3 new people a week. Now how do i get that done up, by going out and hanging out instead of locking myself up and sleeping all day. I think its a good goal. Other than that i'm still looking for a job, i'm going to apply at the Superstore in Clareview and hope to fuck that i get the job. I need money so bad, i dont even have 5 dollars in my pocket right now. I dont even have change for fucks sakes.I am such a bum.

1:27 a.m. - 2003-04-02