You break my heart with every word you say

When he is not here, he does not seem real.

I wanted to write something amazingly beautiful about him, uncensored, real and from the heart. But i have no interest in doing that now.Its not that i dont feel that way its just that after reading his email to me i have nothing to say except that i finally realize he has no faith in me or us.

We are supposed to be moving to calgary, i start my job there on August 2nd...so i cant be there any later. The thing is i have no money.Well i do but not enough you know what i mean. Everything is supposed to be split three ways but if i dont know how much money i'm supposed to be giving because i'm not really let into the process of getting a place to live, then how am i supposed to save enough.

He treats me like an equal...but only when we're having sex or when we're out to eat. Otherwise...i'm just a child. But put on a happy face and pray that he'll never leave. Honestly i dont think anything he could ever do would make me love him any less. He could break my heart and make me cry and i would still love him the way i do now. The only thing that would stop that love would be if he left me and then...I would be lost.

4:09 p.m. - 2003-07-20