You know i'm gonna hold you down. Cause when you were down and out i was still around.

Moving to Calgary on Saturday. My emotions-running on full. I am nervous and scared and worried. I'm also excited. For the first time in 9 months S. and I will be able to hold each other while we fall asleep in our own bed, in our own place. We can do whatever we like and will only have each other to answer to. We have a lot to do before we can settle in. I need to find a job thats closer to where i live and make sure i'm wise with my money, unlike how i have been in the past. I'm learning though and i'm not worried about not being near family because i trust in myself and S., that we can survive together.We can start to build ourselves a future. Of course i had to tell my mom to come visit me as often as possible. I'm going to miss her so much,i already know there will be long days and nights where i will feel lost because she is not there.I also know that i have S. and that with him i can deal with not being with her.

For the first time in a long while i feel like everything is coming into place. I'm absolutely elated and i just know its all going to work out.

I cant believe i found S.. He has been so amazing in this while we have been together. I cant wait for the day that we will be bound by marriage. He's everything i never knew i wanted and everything good that i always wished would happen.

1:01 a.m. - 2003-07-29